Friday 02/07/2011
So, today is the day. I have a pep in my step and am actually excited to see Stone. Stone has and will always be the love of my life...even if we do not end up together. I am so thrilled that I have reached this new level in my life. So, I go through my day with this sole anticipation. Nervous nervous nervous. We have not seen each other in two years. He has sent me an email early in the morning asking me to email him instead of conversing with him via FB and also he does not have a phone. So, we chat via email and he tells me that he gets off at 5 and will be heading my way as soon as he is done with class at 6:45. I am expecting him to get to my place at 7:30 then. So cool I have plenty of time as I have told him that I would be home at 5:30 after running some errands.
After my work day...I run out to pick up last minute things for the cake and am forced to be innovative because I waited till the last minute. No biggie...I get home in a jiffy and start on things. I clean up first and assemble the cake. After the cake is done I get ready. And just tidy up some and put on a movie and sit at my laptop. I am getting nervous as it is 7:15. Oh boy...I have to use the restroom. As soon as I am re-fixing my hair...I hear a familiar voice at my door. My heart races at a mile a minute. I get to the door and yes! it is him!. It is as if no time has passed. We hug and hug and hug. We come in and hug some more. It is such a good feeling. I have missed him so much. My home looks different and he takes the tour. We talk with the heavy presence of the elephant in the room. So, after we get a little comfortable I ask him if he would like to stay for dinner. Sensing his hesitation I did not press him to stay (another milestone for me) and told him so as well. He decided to stay for dinner. I started prepping for dinner while he sat there and talked to me. We talked about everything...I mean everything. It felt so so nice. It was almost no time had passed between us. Almost as if I had just seen him yesterday. It felt so nice to have him there while I cooked for us. He is so easy to talk to and I can talk to him about anything. I have never had a good friend let alone a guy friend that I can be so comfortable around until recently in my life. I really cherish moments like these. I am still nervous yet so content on the inside. All of a sudden I hear a rap on the door and go to check and voila...its my SISTERS!!! I am confused and happy at the same time. I dont think I knew what I felt...lol:) I was happy though because it definitely cut the tension tenfold. I love watching him with my sisters. I could watch the three of them all day. I love watching him interract with my Mother...it is just such an endearing moment.
The night just flows so well amongst laughter, playful banter and good food. There is so much going on that I can barely stay focused. I love the way my sisters have taken charge of the situation and made a stressful situation less stressful. They have to be home before their curfew so they make plans for all of us to hang out for a day...yes!!!
The quiet settles back in and Stone and I hang out on the balcony and catch up. I dont think we have ever had this moment before... to just sit and talk. He always had to be somewhere before. So, this felt nice. He has grown a bit and is content. I love that. Have not seen him like this at all. He refuses to take the cake without paying me and after a tiff...leaves the money on my counter. I box it up and give him a hug. I give him a tight hug and apologize for hurting his feelings but had to express myself in the letter I wrote him. He said it was water under the bridge and that I did not have to be sorry. He said the only reason he ordered the cake was to see me and could not imagine that he could hurt me and was so sorry. It was quite evident that him and I had grown quite a bit. Although moments had passed from the time he was getting ready to leave, neither one of us moved towards the door. I just couldnt and neither did he. We could just stand there and could have allowed time to pass. I cant really explain it but know exactly how that moment felt...three days later as I write this entry. What is this feeling? I cannot shake it off. It has been four years and he still makes me feel the way I did...like when I saw him for the very first time. He said the same thing...as if no time had passed and it was as if our eyes met just yesterday. I sleep with a big smile on my face tonight. Thank you:)
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